The article was from the THE NEW PAPER ON SUNDAY, pg 37, "SHE WANTS HANDPHONE: Should I give my 8-year-old daughter a mobile?"
The article was written by S. Murali, a Dad in a dilemma about whether to give his 8-year-old daughter a mobile phone. This article is an example of the new age predicament for parents, who are obviously pressured to provide more material goods (hence, non-essential goods) to their children. It must be said that children today have many more extra activities even in primary schools and most of the current generation of parents are both working to make ends meet; resulting in less time to run about and pick after their children and therefore the mobile phone provides the next best alternative communicating tool.
But is there such a need?
I'm in no position currently to discuss whether or not to give the kid a phone as I am not yet a parent, so I have no clue as to what my priorities might be when it comes, but this evolution of
technology has definitely changed the lives of humans forever.
Today, most people wouldn't be able to leave their homes without their mobiles, since pay phones are becoming a rarity and we somehow or rather have this niggling constant urge to communicate with someone, with today's most common channel being through SMS.
Murali's article was very well written, pointing out his initial fears (like the phone being a "plaything" rather than a "real functional item"), but he also highlights the changing times and the hectic schedule of his daughter already causing a few mix-ups where either her parents/grandmother/aunt not picking her up on time or they waited hours for her because they didn't know that she had extra activities. He next takes about the pros and cons of giving his daughter a mobile, and is she too young for it? He than has a discussion with two friends with two different opinions and perceptions, the first one saying no to giving the mobile and the second friend reminding him that he is now living in the "dark ages" and emphasis why he should get his daughter a handphone simply because "you can buy a new phone for $50 theses days. Daughters costs a little more." His article ends with him agreeing with his second friend, and it ticks three very important aspects of an article, it appeals to the ethos, pathos, and logos, with credibility (him being a father, so knowing the fears of a missing child), emotion (the importance of your child not being lost ?? ), and reason (why he should indeed get his daughter the phone she craves).
My take on this?
Give the child a phone(a simple one, like those above, should suffice, since they would usually argue that it is for them to call you in case of emergency ;) as it will not only provide a better means of communicating device to their parents, but it will also allow them to blend in with all the other kids in school, who might have the latest nokia or iPhone, and not let them feel left out and be made a mockery off, after all, we all can't live without one too right?
Its true that we are so used to having a handphone by oiur side all the time that we feel uneasy whenever we forget it bring it out with us. Yes having a handphone by your side all the time is convenient. However, we become too dependent on it and leaves us with 'less space' in a way that people as contact you anytime. So much so that sometimes i intentionally not bring my phone out with me!
Tommy, i think you selected a really appropriate article for discussion.
This is indeed the challenge faced by parents nowadays.
My cousin has an iphone- ( she's only pri 3)
her parents however,sees it as a need, not only in locating her but also in keeping her engaged with the technological advances.
They see it as a learning platform whereby she is able to have a hands on experience on such gadgets.
From such a perspective, I will have to say there's nothing wrong in giving her a handphone. (Especially since she has shown herself to be a kid who's responsible for her items)
I would beg to differ if she was rowdy,hyper active, negligent of her belongings.
Thus, in all, i can only say that it is not the age that matters but the kids themselves.
We should see it as a case by case basis.
If there is indeed a need? or is it a want?
if it is within one's means? or beyond?
This shows our dependency on technology nowadays. We used to survive pretty well without handphones, but now we feel so handicapped without it!
I really think that young children do not need a handphone. They should learn to stay 'contactable' and accountable, for example staying where they said they'll be.
Of course, it could also aid the child in learning to be responsible with his handphone and not going above the budget. That could be an important skill to learn when young.
Overall, I see it as dependent on what the handphone is being used for, both by the parent giving it and the child owning it. There are both good sides and bad sides to it!
Well, I'm actually pretty much against kids having phones still, because when I was in primary school, I was also very much involved in extra school activities, but I had to make do with public phones or learn to inform my parents early about what my day is going to be like..
this trained me, well i think it did, to be independent and well organized for my daily activities and hence reduce the need to have any of those "emergencies" calls.
My take is that children just want a phone because his/her friend has one, and it would be cool to own one to.
I agree with Tommy on this. I too do not feel that there's a genuine need for kids to be holding a cellphone. Sadly, this is becoming pretty much a trend these days, as parents tend to pamper their child by giving in to their demands, one too many times. I think this is pretty much an issue of "Wants" vs "Needs". The child might "Want" the cellphone for one reason or another, that does not necessarily justify nor warrents for getting it. Then, who is to say, what's right? What's wrong? It's just really sad that kids these days are no longer as easily satisfied. At least, not when it's compared to mine. Keep up the good work Chris!!
Cheers,
Janson
I concur on your point. Linus and I have discussed this issue a few times. And we felt that a child must "earn" the material goods that they want. Mobile phones are classified as wants in our list and not a need. And only by "earning" it themselves will they then learn the value of money and the things they own. Responsibility is a value that needs to be taught young and unfortunately, many parents are over-indulgent of their kids. I know of a case whereby the parent bought 2 PSP, one for each of her kids. Her explanation, "don't want them to fight over it." If they aren't even instilled the value of sharing, they definitely don't deserve even 1 PSP. ~ Lynn
I feel that hand phones create more problems instead of solving them. One example is when the child's hand phone bills went way beyond his or her limit. Children who owns a hand phone is for their PARENTS to be able to contact them (because parents are the ones who bought for them). Yet many of times children use it to contact their friends and even ignoring their parents' call. Children can also be easy preys to hand phone thieves. I would say that children should not carry a hand phone (I live without a hand phone then so why can't they) but time has changed so I guess it is reasonable to get a simple hand phone.
How often have we ignored SMS's from friends that seem unimportant to us or telll our friends we are sorry via handphones?
Relying on technology actually makes us less tactful to people in a way. (I think).
The moment parents have handphones with them to communicate with their children, does it close the gap between them?
I doubt so for most of us.
It's human nature, when we live an easy life, we forget how difficult it was when we had to run around just to make calls and we take things for granted, and even friends/family too.
Giving a child something he/she wants, without giving it a second thought, is just plain pampering.
Does not have to be handphones, but possibly a PSP, Ipod, laptop, whatever gadgets/gizmos there are out there.
My point is, even if the parents get a handphone for their kids, they must still maintain close communication with them for I fear these kids may not learn to communicate well because of these stuffs, rather, they get attached to their material goods.
You know, kids get angry when their parents tell them to eat when they are having fun with their computer games and stuff and don't want to be interrupted?
I don't know if its the same with handphones, but it could be possible right? They grow attached to those machines and forget the world.
I came across an article whereby Singaporeans who are younger than 30 are filing for bankruptcy due to over spending by using their credit cards without limit. They spend just to 'fit' in with their richer friends.
The thing about fitting in, if kids wanna fit in NOW, what will they me in the future? They won't be themselves for sure. Another thing to ponder about.
If its to gain social acceptance then i say, NO!
Just because her friends have one, she has to have one as well? Just because her friends smoke, then she should as well?
maybe i'll make a strict dad, but i'd want my child to be immune to peer pressure so that he/she will learn to make decisions based on character, not peer pressure.
But if its for emergency purposes and contact with family members then its ok. Which parent doesnt want to hear their child's voice over the phone while at work?
Then again, im only a student. What do i know about parenting...
I agree with your point of view. If parents want to be readily be able to contact their child, a handphone of that sort is more than enough.
Frankly speaking, my take on this is actually that only if you are working should you have the real need for a handphone.
However, that's only my view on a "real need". Handphones are just like add-ons to your life if you have it at any level before people really need to contact you at any time of day, which would be at the working life and nowadays, those those who are above secondary school level, where they might have course projects and what-not that is effectively as good as working life.
Parents wanting to check up on their child is not a need. It's more like something for the parents to satisfy themselves. Nonetheless, it's not a bad thing to want to have the peace of mind. However, that would be up to the parents whether to give their child a handphone in order to attain this.
This means that the child shouldn't be asking for one on their own. Imagine a Primary 3 kid. Other than to call his/her parents, is there really any other need?
Calling your friends on the move is not a need. A majority of the tasks that he/she would think up of is most probably not important.
Since that's the case, I don't see any reason why the kid has a right to ask for a handphone.
Coaxing their parents into getting them one is a whole other story. But if we just want to talk about things that "really matter", most of the students don't really need a handphone. Everything there is are usually excuses. (I know that because I have seen others and myself make up excuses on many occasions as well.)
To wrap this up, there are really a lot of things to consider and that this short post of mine still lacks MANY details to the extent that it will be easy to disagree with me but this is just a very brief wrap up on what I want to say.
(Thousands words essay if you really want to have every detail, possible outcomes and what-not gone through.)
Really, in my one cent worth of opinion, I don't they should get it! HAHA! BECAUSE I ONLY GOT MINE WHEN I WAS IN SECONDARY SCHOOL! i think...
Aside from jealousy, like what you said, is there REALLY A BURNING NEED?! I don't think so. Who would kids at age 8 call? Ghost busters? HAHA! okay, but the real deal is, are parents who give their kids a mobile at 8 teaching correct values? It is going to be like when the reaches the age 20 what is a mobile to them? In my point of view, if you give a kid whatever he/she wants it would damage them.
but, definitely, a mobile would keep them in contact with their parents but, with that parents are encouraging their kids to gallivant around because they are ALWAYS contactable so no big deal.
If parents really need to be a tracker, yea, I agree with you TOMMY! Give them a simple simple simple phone! :D
My personal opinion; as long some parents allow their children to bring handphones to school it creates pressure for the others. But on a larger scale; the world is embracing the use of cell phone to a point where there are more cell phone users in the world compared to the number of people in poverty, not having a handphone (even for pri school kids) puts your social value very low. Pity it has to be like these though. Still, handphones have it's tremendous plus points for children.
the sad fate of earth?
everyone walking with a device that would further deplete our resources and add to global warming aye?
seriously, I can't do without my phone, but I think primary school kids should be able to do that...
I think it's reasonable for a primary 5/6 kid to own a simple phone cos at that age (especially in today's society where kids mature faster) will know how to take care of their phones so no worries of phones getting stolen, also as they grow up they will need to communicate with others as well and phones is a device which makes it convenient for them to communicate with their friends/family.
Besides, wouldn't their parents want to know their whereabouts? I believe whether the kid will pick up/not pick up the phone/choose to lie about his or her whereabout depends a lot on the family discipline.
I should think that in primary school, most activities, if not all are planned and informed in advance, so in the event of an unexepected 'extra activity' (which shouldn't happen that often)pay phones should suffice. But having a handphone will indeed come with it's advantages such as added convenience and etc which have already been discussed.
I guess there's also maybe that added 'danger' of exposing your child to radiation- after all, no studies have proven or refuted the dangers of having a handphone at such a early age.
it doesn't take long to form a habit. hanging on to your hp for dear life might become a habit in a matter of days- the poor child will have to cling on to her hp for dear life for the rest of her life? just like the rest of us...